Tuesday, 31 January 2017

#2058

What magical object could only be used to measure the body fat percentage of the true king?

Ex-caliper.

Monday, 30 January 2017

#2057

What do you call the study of the financial impact of sustainable eating?

Eco-nom-ics.

Sunday, 29 January 2017

#2056

Martina the leatherworker was deeply concerned that the beauty industry would put her out of business; she had fundamentally misunderstood the operational procedures of a tanning salon.

Saturday, 28 January 2017

#2055

What do you call the chrysalis in which calves are wrapped to mature into adults?

A cow-coon.

Friday, 27 January 2017

#2054

What process do new birds undergo when joining a pond?

In-duck-tion.

Thursday, 26 January 2017

#2053

What do ibises celebrate on the 26th of January?

Bin-vasion Day.

Wednesday, 25 January 2017

#2052

What do you call an inclination towards particular purchases?

A buy-as.

Tuesday, 24 January 2017

#2051

What devices are used for the public humiliation of cows?

Beef stocks.

Monday, 23 January 2017

#2050

Sandy was deeply dedicated to cosplaying as a classical musician; every day, she practised her LARPeggios.

Sunday, 22 January 2017

#2049

Marco was very methodical when organising Christmas presents for his female siblings; he was very sister-matic.

Saturday, 21 January 2017

Friday, 20 January 2017

#2047

What did the crows do when they wanted to go into business?

They formed a caw-poration.

Thursday, 19 January 2017

Wednesday, 18 January 2017

#2045

What did the dogs do in the dog government?

They developed paw-licy.

Tuesday, 17 January 2017

#2044

What do you call inventiveness in taverns?

Inn-ovation.

Monday, 16 January 2017

#2043

What heuristic self-awareness exercise must be completed in a great rush?

The Jo-hurry window.

Sunday, 15 January 2017

#2042

What underwater creature is known for the tight security systems around its babies?

The Lock Nest Monster.

Saturday, 14 January 2017

#2041

At first, the scientists thought it impossible that the main pollinating insect could go extinct; they found it un-bee-leave-able.

Friday, 13 January 2017

#2040

What do you call a section of a book about a British everyman?

A chap-ter.

Thursday, 12 January 2017

#2039

What do you call it when someone's spine is damaged by their education?

School-iosis.

Wednesday, 11 January 2017

#2038

What do you call someone who runs a clowning workshop?

A fa-silly-tator.

Tuesday, 10 January 2017

#2037

What area of eastern Europe is noted for its variants of baseball using tin cylinders?

The Ball-can Peninsula.

Monday, 9 January 2017

#2036

What do you call the process of lulling patients to sleep prior to surgery by having them watch the dance of a stripper?

Anas-tease-ia.

Sunday, 8 January 2017

#2035

Long after being liberated from the sweatshop, Yaxi wore the little metal cap on his index finger each morning, as a thimble of his oppression.

Saturday, 7 January 2017

#2034

How did the homosexual feel after being in the closet for years?

Frus-straight-ed.

Friday, 6 January 2017

#2033

Why did Brenton refuse to accept an Australian car from his employer?

He wanted to be be-Holden to no one.

Thursday, 5 January 2017

#2032

Claudie the sniffer dog was highly valued by the drug squad; she was at the scentre of their operations.

Wednesday, 4 January 2017

#2031

What do you call a marketing specialist who sells water-based protection for castles?

A pro-moat-er.

Tuesday, 3 January 2017

#2030

How did the supervisor in the pork products kitchen tells his employees to work faster?

"Come on, get crackling!"

Monday, 2 January 2017

#2029

What do you call an architect who dreams of constructing cathedrals?

A-spire-ing.

Sunday, 1 January 2017

#2028

What do you call the budget manager of a country with a worthless currency?

The trash-urer.